Be Real

  • 30 May 2017

Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful (Proverbs 27:6).

The older I get, the more I long for genuine relationships. I’ve known way too many people who wear a fake smile and give you a standard “Hi” as their voice goes up a little too high and then comes back down, making a simple two-letter word two syllables. These people would probably not do anything mean to your face but there is a good chance that they will tell others what they really think about you the moment they think you are out of ear shot.

Gossip is spoken against in Scripture, and I expect part of the reason is that there is no love in gossip. We are told to speak truth to one another. If you cannot express concerns about me to myself, then you have no business talking to others about them.

I am reading the book of Job again, and I know that a lot of negativity is placed on Job’s friends who wanted him to repent so that God could heal him. Although they misunderstood the situation, I think you have to credit them for being there. They hated to see him suffer so they were trying to help. “Job, you must have sinned. Confess those sins to God so that God will take away your misery.” Because we are reading the account thousands of years later, we know that it was no fault of Job’s that caused God to allow him to be struck. The friends ended up being rebuked but Job himself found that, compared to God, he was not nearly as righteous as he thought himself to be.

This article is not directed at anyone. I am blessed with friends that I believe to be genuine. I hope that I have people in my life who will speak truth to me instead of leaving me to my own devices. I hope that I am that kind of friend as well.

We live in a society where being real is discouraged. We look at others and think, “Boy, if I could just be like that person!” What we don’t see is that “that person” also has trials and disappointments. They just do well at hiding it.

Don’t distance from people but, instead, learn to be real. Seek out others who are real. Don’t settle for those who flatter but look for those who are genuine. I believe you will find more meaning in life if you will do these things.


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  1. Scotty Searan - May 30, 2017 at 2:23 PM

    Sony: I am accused of being too blunt and not showing love

    I do try to warn, that something has the potential of being offensive. Even that sometimes doesn’t work.

    Have I been offended. Yes. But I would rather be told the truth and work out my own feelings than to be told a lie and not be offended

    Offenses do hurt. But they make you grow. Remember when we were younger and the feeling of “growing pains?”

    Sometimes they do leave scars. Because more than likely it was something that needed to be dealt with

    Most people want to shelter people from harm

    Some of the most things people become offended about it is involving their walk with Christ and other believers. People sure are touchy about that.

    Continue speaking the truth. Step on my toes. I will continue to be your friend

  2. Hilary Gronas - May 31, 2017 at 12:12 AM

    Yes, the Book of Job speaks to me too. I read an article recently and the writer labeled Jobs friends “miserable comforters”. That they were!! Sadly, I’ve known a few people who are miserable comforters in my life regarding my health. Only the Lord knows the circumstances but I’ve been told strange things as I’m suffering because I didn’t keep the Sabbath (yes I’ve been told this) or that it’s a demon. Wow, how intense! I can relate to Job as he speaks about his situation with his well meaning friends, who can be quite hurtful sometimes. Thanks for sharing.

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